Rotsterbap is a god.

She takes the form of a rotund, all-knowing faun.

Rotsterbap created a top quark two million years ago.

If you believe in Rotsterbap, she will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Rotsterbap, she will destroy your home solar system.

Rotsterbap's most sacred site is Ronda in Spain.

Rotsterbap's Holy Commandments

1. Never wear ear rings.

2. Dogs are not to be trusted.

3. Never talk about dwarf planets.

4. Hide if six birds approach from the south.

5. Never think about eukaryotes.