Mobbabflat is a god.

It takes the form of a four hundred metre long, fast dryad.

Mobbabflat created the universe three million years ago.

If you believe in Mobbabflat, it will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Mobbabflat, it will send four elephants to rub you out.

Mobbabflat's most sacred site is Cuandixia in China.

Mobbabflat's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of aluminium.

2. Do not commit murder.

3. Always pray in complete darkness.

4. Walk at least three thousand metres per day.

5. Do not speak about peas.