Tabbisslist is a god.

She takes the form of a four thousand metre long, conceited tortoise.

Tabbisslist created the Milkyway eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Tabbisslist, she will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Tabbisslist, she will send four elephants to rub you out.

Tabbisslist's most sacred site is Laurila in Finland.

Tabbisslist's Holy Commandments

1. Always help bats.

2. Erect a giant purple sculpture of Tabbisslist in the centre of the settlement.

3. Look mercifully on unfortunate birds.

4. Always help sick turtles.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.