Cumlinbut is a god.

He takes the form of a very small, unselfish wyvern.

Cumlinbut created energy eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Cumlinbut, he will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Cumlinbut, he will turn you into a duck.

Cumlinbut's most sacred site is Bogogobo in Botswana.

Cumlinbut's Holy Commandments

1. Never prepare tomatoes during winter.

2. Do not wear iron on your body.

3. Always make sure there are no dogs in a building before entering it.

4. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

5. Never eat peas.