Sitmansisrip is a god.

It takes the form of a planet-sized, stupid rat.

Sitmansisrip created Europe five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Sitmansisrip, it will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Sitmansisrip, it will attempt to scare you with floods.

Sitmansisrip's most sacred site is Insel in Germany.

Sitmansisrip's Holy Commandments

1. Sitmansisrip loves birds, so they must be honoured.

2. Never wear yellow kilts.

3. Erect nine platinum sculptures of Sitmansisrip on top of important buildings.

4. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

5. Never talk about mice.