Rakbedjin is a god.

He takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, moody lizard.

Rakbedjin created the Small Magellanic Cloud three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Rakbedjin, he will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Rakbedjin, he will ignore you and hope you go away.

Rakbedjin's most sacred site is Chilhac in France.

Rakbedjin's Holy Commandments

1. Run away if seven ducks approach from the south.

2. Always take life seriously.

3. Run away from indigo snails, for they are unholy.

4. Always wear purple.

5. Never go into cyan rooms.