Arpvilzog is a god.

He takes the form of a small, unthinking raven.

Arpvilzog created dark energy four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Arpvilzog, he will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Arpvilzog, he will try to impress you with trees.

Arpvilzog's most sacred site is Polagam in India.

Arpvilzog's Holy Commandments

1. Feed all hungry sheep.

2. Show mercy to disobedient children.

3. Never eat green fruit.

4. Never write about cell theory.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.