Bagdudcap is a god.

He takes the form of a fat, witty wombat.

Bagdudcap created a Higgs boson four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Bagdudcap, he will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Bagdudcap, he will have a very low opinion of you.

Bagdudcap's most sacred site is Taktser in China.

Bagdudcap's Holy Commandments

1. Never wear green jumpers on sacred days.

2. Never eat figs.

3. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

4. Never bounce in holy places.

5. Run away if five dolphins approach from the east.