Fubortmit Xuckgammab is a god.

He takes the form of a galaxy-sized, humorless dragonfly.

Fubortmit Xuckgammab created light six million years ago.

If you believe in Fubortmit Xuckgammab, he will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Fubortmit Xuckgammab, he will turn you into a goat.

Fubortmit Xuckgammab's most sacred site is Bogogobo in Botswana.

Fubortmit Xuckgammab's Holy Commandments

1. Do not commit murder.

2. Never eat bread.

3. Do not speak about nuts.

4. Do not hurt horses.

5. Never talk about amino acids.