Stragbuggod is a god.

It takes the form of an enormous, dishonest salamander.

Stragbuggod created carbon nine million years ago.

If you believe in Stragbuggod, it will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Stragbuggod, it will jump up and down on your head.

Stragbuggod's most sacred site is Borolong in Botswana.

Stragbuggod's Holy Commandments

1. Always take life seriously.

2. Never pray while filled with fear.

3. Do not cook food in pots.

4. Always remove shoes before entering holy places.

5. Do not hurt moths.