Tadbumwotwabcadontteen is a god.

It takes the form of a fat, egotistical cow.

Tadbumwotwabcadontteen created the planet Earth seven thousand years ago.

If you believe in Tadbumwotwabcadontteen, it will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Tadbumwotwabcadontteen, it will be mildly annoyed.

Tadbumwotwabcadontteen's most sacred site is Chilhac in France.

Tadbumwotwabcadontteen's Holy Commandments

1. Retreat if seven doves approach from the south.

2. Never sit in holy places.

3. Never pour water over plants.

4. Do not fashion models of living things.

5. Always look after injured squirrels.