Pibwonrilomintagdadxin is a god.

He takes the form of a slender, unthinking crocodile.

Pibwonrilomintagdadxin created viruses nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Pibwonrilomintagdadxin, he will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Pibwonrilomintagdadxin, he will attempt to scare you with earthquakes.

Pibwonrilomintagdadxin's most sacred site is Letino in Italy.

Pibwonrilomintagdadxin's Holy Commandments

1. Always help badgers.

2. Never play with disobedient children.

3. Never think ill of sick sharks.

4. Always remove kilts before touching titanium.

5. Never feed coconuts to tapirs while wearing shorts.