Pantarggarhap is a god.

She takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, cheerful crow.

Pantarggarhap created energy two billion years ago.

If you believe in Pantarggarhap, she will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Pantarggarhap, she will turn you into a rock.

Pantarggarhap's most sacred site is Kerris in England.

Pantarggarhap's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed melons to squirrels while wearing yellow shoes.

2. Always obey Pantarggarhap's priests.

3. Learn four new languages a year.

4. Always wear plain ear rings during rituals.

5. Never bounce in the presence of elders.