Saslogcip is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely thin, happy alligator.

Saslogcip created Europe six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Saslogcip, he will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Saslogcip, he will turn you into a goat.

Saslogcip's most sacred site is Polagam in India.

Saslogcip's Holy Commandments

1. Never play with disobedient children.

2. You must never eat peanuts.

3. Never hurt frogs.

4. Saslogcip loves shrews, so they must be respected.

5. Never whisper while facing west.