Nutwapflab Tinmet is a god.

He takes the form of a rotund, all-knowing bat.

Nutwapflab Tinmet created energy four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Nutwapflab Tinmet, he will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Nutwapflab Tinmet, he will curse you and those you beget for all time.

Nutwapflab Tinmet's most sacred site is Auvillar in France.

Nutwapflab Tinmet's Holy Commandments

1. Always obey Nutwapflab Tinmet's priests.

2. Do not fashion tools from lead.

3. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

4. Worship no other gods but Nutwapflab Tinmet.

5. Do not place carrots upon stone.