Padgabdobkin Kikzenbif is a god.
It takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, omnipotent
raccoon.
Padgabdobkin Kikzenbif created a top quark four million years ago.
If you believe in
Padgabdobkin Kikzenbif, it will ignore you forever.
If you do not believe in
Padgabdobkin Kikzenbif, it will turn you into a mole.
Padgabdobkin Kikzenbif's most sacred site is Hej in Sweden.
Padgabdobkin Kikzenbif's Holy Commandments1. You must pray to Padgabdobkin Kikzenbif six times a day.
2. Never talk about nucleic acids.
3. Always wear white.
4. Always make sure there are no capybaras in a room before entering it.
5. Erect a giant silver sculpture of Padgabdobkin Kikzenbif in the centre of the settlement.