Jarntenaf is a god.

He takes the form of a huge, impressive turtle.

Jarntenaf created the planet Jupiter two years ago.

If you believe in Jarntenaf, he will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Jarntenaf, he will turn you into a frog.

Jarntenaf's most sacred site is Auvillar in France.

Jarntenaf's Holy Commandments

1. Do not study chlorophyll on holy days.

2. Heed all visions.

3. Erect a giant lead sculpture of Jarntenaf in the centre of the settlement.

4. Do not eat turnips.

5. Never think about black holes.