Ruttlegyarp is a god.

She takes the form of a very large, merciful finch.

Ruttlegyarp created life two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Ruttlegyarp, she will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Ruttlegyarp, she will turn you into a blue tit.

Ruttlegyarp's most sacred site is Katballe in Denmark.

Ruttlegyarp's Holy Commandments

1. Always help porpoises.

2. Never wear gray tights on sacred days.

3. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

4. Erect three nickel sculptures of Ruttlegyarp on top of important buildings.

5. Run away if eight dogs approach from the north.