Fobpanhiv is a god.

It takes the form of a six thousand metre long, self-assured wren.

Fobpanhiv created time and space five million years ago.

If you believe in Fobpanhiv, it will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Fobpanhiv, it will cry a lot.

Fobpanhiv's most sacred site is Monong in Botswana.

Fobpanhiv's Holy Commandments

1. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

2. Always wear purple.

3. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

4. Always stare at clouds.

5. Do not wear magenta clothing.