Bonkfentaf is a god.

He takes the form of a large, awe-inspiring weasel.

Bonkfentaf created the planet Earth eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Bonkfentaf, he will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Bonkfentaf, he will turn you into a frog.

Bonkfentaf's most sacred site is Letino in Italy.

Bonkfentaf's Holy Commandments

1. Do not fashion tools from silver.

2. Never stain your back with magenta.

3. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Never speak of order in the presence of strangers.

5. You must never eat limes.