Omtcedbun Vigjannulldam is a god.

He takes the form of a four hundred metre long, charitable fly.

Omtcedbun Vigjannulldam created dark energy four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Omtcedbun Vigjannulldam, he will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Omtcedbun Vigjannulldam, he will turn you into a sheep.

Omtcedbun Vigjannulldam's most sacred site is Mmankgodi in Botswana.

Omtcedbun Vigjannulldam's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about quantum mechanics.

2. Never think about quantum gravity near doves while wearing yellow shoes and balancing three titanium spheres on your chest.

3. Do not wear silver on your body.

4. Omtcedbun Vigjannulldam loves foxes, so they must be respected.

5. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Omtcedbun Vigjannulldam.