Quimflankonmip is a god.

It takes the form of a microscopic, contented zebra.

Quimflankonmip created the Sombrero Galaxy nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Quimflankonmip, it will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Quimflankonmip, it will curse you and those you beget for all time.

Quimflankonmip's most sacred site is Krina in Germany.

Quimflankonmip's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about archaea.

2. Do not wear platinum on your body.

3. Do not wear violet clothing.

4. Do not leap in public.

5. Never talk about the strong nuclear force.