Sinfossfid is a god.

He takes the form of a minute, grumpy zebra.

Sinfossfid created the world six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Sinfossfid, he will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Sinfossfid, he will curse you and those you beget for twenty six billion years.

Sinfossfid's most sacred site is Zhelaizhai in China.

Sinfossfid's Holy Commandments

1. Sinfossfid must be the most important thing in your life.

2. Retreat if eight tapirs approach from the south.

3. Never talk about nucleic acids.

4. Never feed corn to mites while wearing pink tights.

5. Do not wear fawn clothing.