Jankamwap is a god.

It takes the form of an one thousand metre long, egotistical parrot.

Jankamwap created bats eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Jankamwap, it will celebrate by creating some nebulas.

If you do not believe in Jankamwap, it will turn you into a giant slug.

Jankamwap's most sacred site is Uruachi in Mexico.

Jankamwap's Holy Commandments

1. Always share coconuts with strangers, but never with ducks.

2. Erect a large nickel sculpture of Jankamwap on top of all buildings.

3. Always act with purity when addressing elders.

4. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Always help goats.