Yoklagpog is a god.

It takes the form of a small, stupid jellyfish.

Yoklagpog created the planet Venus five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Yoklagpog, it will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Yoklagpog, it will destroy your home galaxy.

Yoklagpog's most sacred site is Snipp in Sweden.

Yoklagpog's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

2. Look mercifully on unfortunate rats.

3. Never write about the strong nuclear force.

4. Erect a large silicon sculpture of Yoklagpog on top of all buildings.

5. Run away from turquoise porpoises, for they are unholy.