Nigstangub Flatjipnuttstanbanstanquagbag is a god.

It takes the form of a large, boastful guinea pig.

Nigstangub Flatjipnuttstanbanstanquagbag created vertebrates three billion years ago.

If you believe in Nigstangub Flatjipnuttstanbanstanquagbag, it will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Nigstangub Flatjipnuttstanbanstanquagbag, it will turn you into a small brown duck.

Nigstangub Flatjipnuttstanbanstanquagbag's most sacred site is Yongding in China.

Nigstangub Flatjipnuttstanbanstanquagbag's Holy Commandments

1. Do not wear gray clothing.

2. Always stare at clouds.

3. Always make sure there are no great tits in a room before entering it.

4. Do not wear gold on your body.

5. Erect a large tin sculpture of Nigstangub Flatjipnuttstanbanstanquagbag on top of all buildings.