Padbonfarn is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely small, kind giraffe.

Padbonfarn created a charm quark eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Padbonfarn, it will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Padbonfarn, it will come to you in dreams.

Padbonfarn's most sacred site is Ans in Denmark.

Padbonfarn's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of platinum.

2. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

3. Always treat badgers with great respect.

4. Never feed bananas to tapirs while wearing orange coats.

5. Never think about dark energy near pigs while wearing gray skirts and balancing six zinc spheres on your chest.