Hinvabhan is a god.

She takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, unsympathetic guinea pig.

Hinvabhan created the planet Mars eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Hinvabhan, she will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Hinvabhan, she will be very unhappy.

Hinvabhan's most sacred site is Brancion in France.

Hinvabhan's Holy Commandments

1. Hide from gray bats for they are unholy.

2. Do not kill rats.

3. Hinvabhan loves badgers, so they must be respected.

4. Do not wear mauve clothing.

5. You must pray to Hinvabhan three times a day.