Jabkemzimgofcatontpasged is a god.

She takes the form of an one thousand metre long, merciless donkey.

Jabkemzimgofcatontpasged created an up quark three billion years ago.

If you believe in Jabkemzimgofcatontpasged, she will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Jabkemzimgofcatontpasged, she will strike you with lightening.

Jabkemzimgofcatontpasged's most sacred site is Maijoma in Mexico.

Jabkemzimgofcatontpasged's Holy Commandments

1. Voles are not to be trusted.

2. Do not contemplate quantum mechanics during the night.

3. Never talk about nebulae.

4. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

5. Do not dye your hair red.