Wodvagmipbarn is a god.

He takes the form of a massive, astonishing yak.

Wodvagmipbarn created the Andromeda Galaxy twelve years ago.

If you believe in Wodvagmipbarn, he will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Wodvagmipbarn, he will send four elephants to rub you out.

Wodvagmipbarn's most sacred site is Amrit in Egypt.

Wodvagmipbarn's Holy Commandments

1. Always take life seriously.

2. Never speak of balance in the presence of children.

3. Never think about eukaryotes.

4. Respect your elders.

5. Never fashion tools from stone.