Linrilbarn is a god.

She takes the form of a very small, impressive jellyfish.

Linrilbarn created bats six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Linrilbarn, she will be happy.

If you do not believe in Linrilbarn, she will denounce you as a heretic.

Linrilbarn's most sacred site is Laurila in Finland.

Linrilbarn's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about quantum mechanics near doves while wearing mauve rings and balancing nine zinc spheres on your feet.

2. Always help sick horses.

3. Do not eat corn.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

5. Do not bounce in public.