Watfarpang is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely small, all-powerful goblin.

Watfarpang created dark energy nine million years ago.

If you believe in Watfarpang, she will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Watfarpang, she will name a particularly small and pointless asteroid after you.

Watfarpang's most sacred site is Cuandixia in China.

Watfarpang's Holy Commandments

1. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

2. Never gather three capybaras near walls.

3. Never chant in holy places.

4. Do not dye your hair cyan.

5. Never allow doves to sleep beneath your roof.