Flapruttgeblap is a god.

She takes the form of a thin, egotistical dragon.

Flapruttgeblap created gold six billion years ago.

If you believe in Flapruttgeblap, she will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Flapruttgeblap, she will turn you into a dog.

Flapruttgeblap's most sacred site is Oitti in Finland.

Flapruttgeblap's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about thermodynamics near mice while wearing orange scarves and balancing eight silver spheres on your head.

2. Flapruttgeblap loves dolphins, so they must be honoured.

3. Never eat green fruit.

4. Do not wear zinc on your body.

5. Never write about stars.