Liknurlvolmut is a god.

It takes the form of a fat, dishonourable duck.

Liknurlvolmut created tapeworms four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Liknurlvolmut, it will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Liknurlvolmut, it will turn you into a mole.

Liknurlvolmut's most sacred site is Snapp in Sweden.

Liknurlvolmut's Holy Commandments

1. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

2. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

3. Pray towards the west.

4. Never pour water over plants.

5. You must love Liknurlvolmut.