Cabkapben is a god.

He takes the form of a three thousand metre long, kind raven.

Cabkapben created time and space seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Cabkapben, he will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Cabkapben, he will curse you with boils.

Cabkapben's most sacred site is Zlatolist in Bulgaria.

Cabkapben's Holy Commandments

1. Learn four new languages a year.

2. Always help sick nematodes.

3. Never feed lots of parsnips to snails while wearing blue trousers.

4. Never wear pink shoes.

5. Do not speak about bread.