Flyrillcep is a god.

It takes the form of a chunky, merciful cow.

Flyrillcep created the world seven thousand years ago.

If you believe in Flyrillcep, it will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Flyrillcep, it will turn you into a sparrow.

Flyrillcep's most sacred site is Diebzig in Germany.

Flyrillcep's Holy Commandments

1. Erect a large tin sculpture of Flyrillcep on top of all buildings.

2. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

3. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Always make sure there are no squirrels in a building before entering it.

5. Flyrillcep loves sharks, so they must be honoured.