Metgepdud is a god.

He takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, selfish penguin.

Metgepdud created dark matter five billion years ago.

If you believe in Metgepdud, he will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Metgepdud, he will turn you into a hamster.

Metgepdud's most sacred site is Faux Cap in Madagascar.

Metgepdud's Holy Commandments

1. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. Never think about quantum mechanics near bats while wearing cyan shoes and balancing seven lead spheres on your chest.

3. Do not kill cats.

4. Hide if five snails approach from the east.

5. Do not chop down trees.