Tarqueegapp is a god.

It takes the form of a very large, egotistical dragon.

Tarqueegapp created time and space three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Tarqueegapp, it will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Tarqueegapp, it will turn you into a sparrow.

Tarqueegapp's most sacred site is Ilmola in Finland.

Tarqueegapp's Holy Commandments

1. Never bounce in the presence of elders.

2. Never mark doors with mauve.

3. Never feed rice to foxes while wearing shirts.

4. Show mercy to disobedient children.

5. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.