Gamjarnsaw is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely small, irritating pigeon.

Gamjarnsaw created the Cigar Galaxy seven million years ago.

If you believe in Gamjarnsaw, he will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Gamjarnsaw, he will destroy your favourite solar system.

Gamjarnsaw's most sacred site is Denshawai in Egypt.

Gamjarnsaw's Holy Commandments

1. Always treat doves with great respect.

2. Draw representations of galaxies on the walls of your dwelling place.

3. Hide if six squirrels approach from the east.

4. Never wear violet scarves.

5. Gamjarnsaw must be the most important thing in your life.