Wat is a god.

She takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, tranquil dugong.

Wat created light three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Wat, she will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Wat, she will laugh at you.

Wat's most sacred site is Quellendorf in Germany.

Wat's Holy Commandments

1. You must never eat onions.

2. Never look at comets.

3. Always make a point of helping unfortunate hamsters.

4. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

5. Never think about ultrasonics.