Sagbapbon is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely small, calm bird.

Sagbapbon created Europe five billion years ago.

If you believe in Sagbapbon, it will be happy.

If you do not believe in Sagbapbon, it will destroy your home planet.

Sagbapbon's most sacred site is Khwee in Botswana.

Sagbapbon's Holy Commandments

1. Run away if six tortoises approach from the west.

2. Never think ill of sick mites.

3. Do not dye your hair black.

4. Do not stand on grass.

5. Never play with disobedient children.