Timquillfud is a god.

He takes the form of a galaxy-sized, caring rhinoceros.

Timquillfud created an up quark four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Timquillfud, he will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Timquillfud, he will name a particularly small and pointless asteroid after you.

Timquillfud's most sacred site is Snapp in Sweden.

Timquillfud's Holy Commandments

1. Walk at least four thousand metres per day.

2. Do not record signs concerning dwarf planets.

3. Heed all signs.

4. Never paint your neck violet.

5. Never talk about fire.