Saktamtan is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely heavy, able newt.

Saktamtan created the solar system four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Saktamtan, it will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Saktamtan, it will send five hundred and sixty eight geese to peck you to death.

Saktamtan's most sacred site is Oitti in Finland.

Saktamtan's Holy Commandments

1. Do not kill moths.

2. Heed all visions.

3. Never mark doors with turquoise.

4. Paint representations of moons on the walls of your dwelling place in cyan.

5. Do not listen to music.