Dagfobwig is a god.

She takes the form of a very long, tiresome hippopotamus.

Dagfobwig created an up quark three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Dagfobwig, she will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Dagfobwig, she will turn you into a frog.

Dagfobwig's most sacred site is Yongding in China.

Dagfobwig's Holy Commandments

1. Never pour water over plants.

2. Never whisper while facing north.

3. Always make a point of helping unfortunate rats.

4. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

5. Always obey Dagfobwig's priests.