Disstikwit is a god.

It takes the form of a very thin, fast jellyfish.

Disstikwit created vertebrates seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Disstikwit, it will be happy.

If you do not believe in Disstikwit, it will send four elephants to rub you out.

Disstikwit's most sacred site is Pandamatenga in Botswana.

Disstikwit's Holy Commandments

1. Always store rice above ground.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

3. Feed all hungry horses.

4. Respect your elders.

5. Shun those given to greed.