Ratflamcub is a god.

He takes the form of an exceedingly large, ruthless salamander.

Ratflamcub created the Virgo Supercluster three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Ratflamcub, he will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Ratflamcub, he will send you a sign.

Ratflamcub's most sacred site is Esse in Finland.

Ratflamcub's Holy Commandments

1. Ratflamcub loves snakes, so they must be respected.

2. Never eat green fruit.

3. Do not count beyond five during ceremonies.

4. Never talk about gravity near nematodes while wearing orange rings and balancing six nickel spheres on your legs.

5. Erect three platinum sculptures of Ratflamcub on top of important buildings.