Yar Kemlakhad is a god.

It takes the form of a gargantuan, loving guinea pig.

Yar Kemlakhad created the Cigar Galaxy four million years ago.

If you believe in Yar Kemlakhad, it will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Yar Kemlakhad, it will think nothing of it.

Yar Kemlakhad's most sacred site is Nanjie in China.

Yar Kemlakhad's Holy Commandments

1. Put Yar Kemlakhad first in all things.

2. Never play with disobedient children.

3. Do not fashion models of living things.

4. Do not commit murder.

5. Do not shave your hands.