Kipgenstig is a god.

She takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, humorless chinchilla.

Kipgenstig created the Andromeda Galaxy five million years ago.

If you believe in Kipgenstig, she will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Kipgenstig, she will hide angry, poisonous snakes in your dwelling place.

Kipgenstig's most sacred site is Hoddom in Scotland.

Kipgenstig's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about quantum gravity.

2. Erect a giant gold sculpture of Kipgenstig in the centre of the settlement.

3. Learn seven new languages a year.

4. Never speak aloud of signs.

5. Do not commit murder.