Mapstikdib is a god.

She takes the form of an exceedingly fat, duplicitous crane.

Mapstikdib created the universe four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Mapstikdib, she will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Mapstikdib, she will send two she bears to sort you out.

Mapstikdib's most sacred site is Landsort in Sweden.

Mapstikdib's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about galaxies.

2. Never allow sheep to sleep beneath your roof.

3. Do not trade with those who eat oranges.

4. Shun those given to sloth.

5. Do not fashion sacred items from bone.