Kimvidfid is a god.

It takes the form of a microscopic, all-powerful crane.

Kimvidfid created everything that exists eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Kimvidfid, it will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Kimvidfid, it will destroy your favourite galaxy.

Kimvidfid's most sacred site is Bodieve in England.

Kimvidfid's Holy Commandments

1. Always take life seriously.

2. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

3. Never stain your neck with indigo.

4. Always cleanse your hands after touching silver.

5. Hide from black birds for they are unholy.